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Ozzy OsbourneOzzy Osbourne
God Bless...
(Eagle Vision)

So what do we want from our metal documentaries? Well the USP of all the most successful ones to date (Anvil, Metallica, Lemmy), is they need to be warts an’ all efforts – more so in the case of Lemmy, fnar fnar – and this effort by Ozzy’s son Jack certainly doesn’t shy away from the more unappealing aspects of his father’s life, in fact it is entirely due to this unflinching gaze that God Bless Ozzy Osbourne is so watchable. The down side to this is that Ozzy is revealed to be something of a twat who singularly failed in his duties as a father (all five children from both his marriages are pretty clear about this), a husband (aside from regularly belting her, he actually tried to kill Sharon), in fact as a fully functioning human being (innocent animals are slaughtered, defecation is liberally smeared, oh how we laughed), and is this laughable excuse for a man contrite? Nah, not really, he was a drunken drug-fiend we are repeatedly reminded, that’s just what they do. The fact that his children all seem to still love him seems to be far more about their patience than his penitence and by the end credits you are left with an overwhelming sense of relief that you aren’t related to the man.
The Oracle

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Roy OrbisonRoy Orbison
In Dreams
(Sony/BMG)

Not the first time this ‘authorised documentary’ has been released but, if you don’t have it, now is the time to pick it up as it’s been updated to include a second live audio CD featuring many of the mans, idiotically long list of, hit records. It also boasts a list of famous fans so comprehensive they occasionally slow the documentary down due to the logistics of stuffing so much talking head footage into the proceedings – god alone knows what it must have been like editing down footage of Bono, Bruce Springsteen, Robert Plant, Jeff Lynne, Bill Wyman, David Lynch, Martin Sheen, Willie Nelson, Johnny Cash and Emmy Lou Harris into bite sized morsels, and these are just a small percentage of those queuing to big the man up. Having lost his first wife and two children in tragic circumstances whilst his star was still in the ascendancy it’s perhaps not surprising he then spent many years in the wilderness prior to being rediscovered by a younger audience (thanks to David Lynch’s decision to use ‘In Dreams’ in his movie Blue Velvet), before dying himself far too early at 52.

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The OffspringThe Offspring
Complete Music Video Collection
(Sony)

Say what you like about Dexter, Noodles, Stig and Biggles (oh, OK those last two are made up) – if you’ve never heard the lads imagine Ozzy era Black Sabbath if they’d grown up listening to the Sex Pistols and enjoyed skating – as befits all MTV generation punks, they know a bit about wrapping their punky pop/metal with slick mini-movies (the mad morphing video for The Kids Aren’t Alright and the Ed ‘Big Daddy’ Roth style cartooning on She’s Got Issues being cases in point, although the best moment is actually bonus nosebleed punk blatter Da Hui). Of course you’re not gonna find any deep wisdom here as the chaps mainly do ‘don’t trust girls’ and ‘don’t deal with the man’ (sample lyric ‘You get no respect, you get no relief, you gotta speak up, and yell out your piece, so back off your rules, back off your jive, ‘cause I'm sick of not living to stay alive), but for a couple of hours of brainless big chorus driven punk, this fits the bill pretty well and if you’re one of the fans that didn’t desert them when they defected to a major label then this will have pretty much everything you could possibly want

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